Choosing a sleep method

What are the methods?

There are two main options to consider when sleep training your baby. Both of them, if consistently applied, will help him sleep better. The basic methods are:

Controlled crying

Leaving your baby to cry himself to sleep from night one, returning to reassure him briefly at specified intervals.

• Controlled crying is suitable for:

  Healthy babies of six months or more, and for parents who are able to allow their baby to cry it out. It is an especially useful method for families needing a very quick solution to their baby's sleep problem.

• It may not be suitable for:

  Babies who are under five months old, are unwell or have special needs. It is not an acceptable method for parents who cannot bear to leave their baby to cry for long periods.

Gradual withdrawal

Remaining with your baby as he learns to settle to sleep alone, then gradually moving away from him.

• Gradual withdrawal is suitable for:

  Babies of all ages. This method is especially good for babies with ongoing medical or developmental difficulties. It will suit parents who can not or will not allow their babies to cry excessively.

• It may not be suitable for:

  Parents in need of a speedy solution or parents who are unable to commit to the demands of sitting beside their baby for lengthy periods during the night.

Controlled crying: step by step

Night one

• After placing your baby into his cot, kiss him goodnight and then leave the room. If he cries, leave him for five minutes before returning briefly to him to pat, reassure and help him re-settle again. Spend no more than a minute with him and then leave again, even if he cries again.
• Leave it for 10 minutes this time before returning to him and settling him very briefly again.
• Extend the period of your absence to 15 minutes. Return to him if he is still crying and settle him briefly as before.
• From then on, go in every 15 minutes until he has gone to sleep. Make sure that you are not in the room with him as he drops off.

Night two

After placing him into his cot awake, leave him and go in after 10 minutes, then at five-minute intervals up to a maximum of 20 minutes. If he is still awake and crying, go in to him and settle him in the same consistent manner every 20 minutes.

Night three

Initially leave your baby for 15 minutes, then five-minute intervals to a maximum of 25 minutes. After tonight, he should be sleeping through the night.

Gradual withdrawal: step by step

Step one (approximately two nights)

Place your baby into his cot and remain beside him until he has gone to sleep. You can give as much physical contact as he needs to settle. Lean right into his cot if necessary, but don't get him out of the cot or feed him again. He will cry because he is used to being fed to sleep but don't worry – you are constantly beside him to reassure him and to make sure that he comes to no harm.

Step two (approximately two nights)

Once your baby becomes comfortable about falling asleep in his cot and is no longer dependent on sucking to sleep, you need to withdraw some of your physical contact. Don't leave him alone yet. Remain beside his cot, cut down on eye contact with him and make sure that as he enters sleep, you are not touching him.

Step three (can take up to two weeks)

Move your chair a little further away from your baby's cot each night until you are outside his room. Do this in tiny stages, so that your baby has time to get used to the change.

From Teach Yourself Baby Sleep by Andrea Grace. Published by Hodder Education